What’s up with Dress Barn?

I mean, seriously.
So you’re thinking of a name for your new store, and based on your mission statement, you want it clear that beauty, character, freedom of expression, and, uh, beauty should be key values. You want a name to reflect that. The name you pick?
Dress Barn.
To me, this conjours up images of hastily hand sewn former tablecloth/curtain patterned atrocities worn by women who, in some states, are required to beep while backing up. Go ahead and close your eyes.
Breathe deeply.
Empty your mind.So, to your inner diva, the words “Dress Barn,” and what images appear? Are they delightful patterns? Soft, soothing fabrics?
Or perhaps you’re like me and you think of a tarp stretched tautly over a dump truck sized behmoth of an arse?
Another thing. Unfortunate acronyms.
There’s a consulting firm that has a few employees on our staff that has one of them. Interactive Business Systems, they are, and I’m always hesitant to eat the snacks they bring in. You know, who really wants to eat something courtesy of I.B.S.?
I’m going to take seriously the Moro Islamic Liberation Front? The last MILF that threatened me was Stiffler’s mom.
See-Crap. That’s all I have to say. They say more about it here.
That being said, I’m going to open me up a store, selling pants for men called “Trouser Shanty,” and according to Google, no one has put those two words together before.